In 2023

Last year's predictions were another mixed bag. However, I brought up Elon Musk causing people to return Teslas and Vladimir Putin's reduced status in the world in a single prediction. I'm calling it a win and a reason to write about

Predictions for 2023

• Elon Musk releases more "Twitter Files" that make conservatives angry but unable to sue, since Twitter is now owned by Musk and he fired all the Fauci fanboys.
• With retired Pope Benedict's death, the Catholic Church considers appointing a backup pope for future contingencies.
• Former Prince Harry is outraged at the Vatican for trying to steal his title as Spare. Pope Francis asks to appoint Meghan Markle as spare Pope.
• Pope Francis is sent directly to Hell by the College of Cardinals, through a portal built over the Vatican.
• In a last ditch effort, the J6 Committee releases Trump's tax records, nude pictures of his wife and a horde of murder hornets. Elon Musk posts a picture of Miss Piggy with Liz Cheney's glasses and get more hits on Twitter.
• A new COVID vaccine kills every 10th person on the spot. The CDC suggests people take 23 boosters of the old vaccine instead.
• The Biden administration tries to prevent a recession by releasing what's left of the Petroleum reserve. He discovers it only contains an IOU from "The Big Guy."
• As fuel prices explode, rich liberals who got virtue signalling solar panels mock the American people on social media. Their panels are stolen at gunpoint.
• The death of Barbara Walters means that Satan is free from the pact she made with him to keep "The View" on the air.
• Whoopi Goldberg is consumed by hellfire live on-air. She blames the Jews.