In 2020
I guess I exaggerated about 82 Democratic candidates for president... a little. While I'm still woke this evening, I have some
Predictions for 2020
1. The Senate Impeachment Trial takes place for 15 hours before the President is acquitted on all articles. Donald Trump wants to package the trial as a series of TV episodes with a format like "The Apprentice." He even declares that Speaker Nancy Pelosi is fired.
2. Late night TV hosts mock Trump for weeks, explaining that he can't get the leader of the House to lose her job.
3. In a surprising upset, Nancy Pelosi loses her House seat to another Democrat due to her "failure to impeach Trump hard enough."
4. After the cosmos is set right by "Old Town Road" making Billy Ray Cyrus more famous than Miley Cyrus again, Miley attempts to borrow from the disco era with the mediocre "Cocaine-Fueled Drag Queen Trying To Stay Relevant."
5. Miley Cyrus is sued by both Madonna and Cher for intellectual property theft.
6. With the success of Disney's "The Mandalorian" and the general sucking of "The Rise of Skywalker," all future franchise movies will begin with "Mandalorian Wars."
7. The script for Mandalorian Wars 2 by J. J. Abrams is leaked. Essentially, it is the script for Star Trek: Into Darkness, only the name "Khan" is replaced by "Mandalorian."
8. Supreme Court watchers are shocked by the news that Ruth Bader Ginsburg has been dead for 3 years and Kate McKinnon has been impersonating her.
9. Brexit finally goes through. Ireland decides to break away from the UK and become part of the EU on its own. The EU then declares Ireland unnecessary and its assets are distributed to wealthy Germans.
10. Joe Biden's top standing in the polls starts to deteriorate. He either can become Vice President, again, at age 77, or leave political life with dignity. He becomes Elizabeth Warren's running mate.
11. On the last day of the Republican Convention, a guest on Fox News explains how Trump could liven his campaign with another running mate. That evening, Donald Trump accepts the nomination, saying "Thanks. So I guess I can pick another VP. I didn't know that. I pick Ivanka. Year of the Woman, whatever. Night, everybody."
12. Trump debates Elizabeth Warren with almost the same talking points as Hillary Clinton, replacing "e-mail" with "Pocahontas." He wins the general election by 0.5% in five states.
13. Scientists are amazed when they literally see liberal heads explode.
Predictions for 2020
1. The Senate Impeachment Trial takes place for 15 hours before the President is acquitted on all articles. Donald Trump wants to package the trial as a series of TV episodes with a format like "The Apprentice." He even declares that Speaker Nancy Pelosi is fired.
2. Late night TV hosts mock Trump for weeks, explaining that he can't get the leader of the House to lose her job.
3. In a surprising upset, Nancy Pelosi loses her House seat to another Democrat due to her "failure to impeach Trump hard enough."
4. After the cosmos is set right by "Old Town Road" making Billy Ray Cyrus more famous than Miley Cyrus again, Miley attempts to borrow from the disco era with the mediocre "Cocaine-Fueled Drag Queen Trying To Stay Relevant."
5. Miley Cyrus is sued by both Madonna and Cher for intellectual property theft.
6. With the success of Disney's "The Mandalorian" and the general sucking of "The Rise of Skywalker," all future franchise movies will begin with "Mandalorian Wars."
7. The script for Mandalorian Wars 2 by J. J. Abrams is leaked. Essentially, it is the script for Star Trek: Into Darkness, only the name "Khan" is replaced by "Mandalorian."
8. Supreme Court watchers are shocked by the news that Ruth Bader Ginsburg has been dead for 3 years and Kate McKinnon has been impersonating her.
9. Brexit finally goes through. Ireland decides to break away from the UK and become part of the EU on its own. The EU then declares Ireland unnecessary and its assets are distributed to wealthy Germans.
10. Joe Biden's top standing in the polls starts to deteriorate. He either can become Vice President, again, at age 77, or leave political life with dignity. He becomes Elizabeth Warren's running mate.
11. On the last day of the Republican Convention, a guest on Fox News explains how Trump could liven his campaign with another running mate. That evening, Donald Trump accepts the nomination, saying "Thanks. So I guess I can pick another VP. I didn't know that. I pick Ivanka. Year of the Woman, whatever. Night, everybody."
12. Trump debates Elizabeth Warren with almost the same talking points as Hillary Clinton, replacing "e-mail" with "Pocahontas." He wins the general election by 0.5% in five states.
13. Scientists are amazed when they literally see liberal heads explode.
posted by RomeHater @ 6:59 PM
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