In 2018

Thank you, President Trump. Not for the meager legislation passed or rescinding Executive Orders. Anyone could do that. However, you helped make a prediction come true. One Senator resigned and others have announced they will not run for reelection. Plus, Democrats tried and failed to start Impeachment hearings.

With that minor victory in mind, I present

Predictions for 2018

1. A major compromise is reached on the border wall when record cold in the East and fires raging in the West prompts the creation of a "heat pipe" along a border wall to transfer dry, hot air from California and cold, wet air from New York to each other.
2. While the physics of the heat pipe are surprisingly sound, people still leave NY and CA because the government and many of the people there still suck.
3. Due to fears of more sexual harassment allegations, companies start to hire women as managers, especially over other women.
4. Sexual harassment claims drop dramatically, but there is a sharp rise in complaints of regular harassment and "making me cry."
5. At the one-year point in the Trump Administration, many staffers exit the White House, often by jumping out a second floor window.
6. Fox News experiences a hiring boom as President Trump hires many of the network's show hosts and experts to work for him.
7. MSNBC's Morning Joe completely loses touch with reality as Joe and Mika start reporting on the Impeachment of Donald Trump, an event that is not actually happening.
8. Police departments start deploying drones to observe bad neighborhoods. Gang leaders respond by buying drones and taping guns to them. Thus begins what will be known as the Drone Wars, which is actually more entertaining that Star Wars' "Clone Wars."
9. Democrats are emboldened by good polling and increased fundraising during the summer, then lose badly when they actually start campaigning on their issues.
10. Mild weather and a smaller number of storm events around the world prompt climate change supporters to claim that it's because Global Warming is so bad, the globe got tired and had to take a year off.